This morning I was sitting and actually doing my homework for women’s bible study.  I am reading through the scriptures and 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV) For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. pops into my head.  My lesson is about Grace and this free gift given by God through his Son, Jesus Christ.  So what are you showing me God?

I know that God is working on my heart and my mind.  When He starts working on me, that is calling me to make some changes in my life.  One of the thoughts that have been coming up in my life is I have not loved me as God loves me.  If I did would I have allowed myself to get to be 75 lbs overweight.  Would I have allowed my finances, my home, my relationships to be chaotic, stressful.  At one point in my life, I exercised everyday.  I wrote letters to friends and family far away.  I purposefully made time for friends and family.  I worked my way out of debt.  I kept things organized.

Somewhere I allowed my thoughts about myself put a seed in my heart that what I did or said, that my very existence didn’t matter.  Oh, how I must of broke my Heavenly Father’s heart when that thought took root.  I have allowed fear to take root.  The Holy Spirit is so awesome in how he reminds us of who we are in Christ.  I am reminded that the changes happening in my life are cleaning out the junk so it can be replaced by the power, love and sound mind.

I don’t have to listen to the crazy thoughts that go against that very truth.  I have no reason to have fear  in my life for the bible even says – If God is for us, who can be against us.  This next week I will be travelling to assist my sister and her family.  I am a home body and sadness comes over me but when this feeling comes I start singing a praise and worship song and the lyrics it say:

The Lord is my light and salvation, whom shall I fear whom shall I be afraid.

I will trust in you

I will remain confident in this.

I will see the goodness of the Lord.

I am choosing to embrace the changes that God has placed on my heart.  I am done struggling.  I am at a point where enough is enough.  I believe when we get to that point of working with God instead of outside of him, it is at that point we will not fear but embrace change.